your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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