Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
3 2 1 whiskey
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
