I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
