Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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