I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
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In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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