This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Liz is crying about burritos again.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
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