Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize