Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Do vagina's smell?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
