she was so not down for the gang bang
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize