I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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