nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
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