Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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