I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
