dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Randomize
