I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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