i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
