It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize