Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
