once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
