i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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