I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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