Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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