"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
