I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
zippers are such a cool invention
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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