If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
