i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize