Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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