Texts From Last Night

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  (416): View more from Ontario

  i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?

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  (416): i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ? http://tfl.nu/m6rh
  Replies (9) Good night (622) Bad night (2535)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth

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  (919): It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth http://tfl.nu/y1ni
  Replies (23) Good night (484) Bad night (5031)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.

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  (973): how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/ql7e
  Replies (19) Good night (4365) Bad night (2032)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.

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  (609): i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying. http://tfl.nu/89ja
  Replies (10) Good night (3112) Bad night (754)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working

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  (289): Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working http://tfl.nu/bi46
  Replies (3) Good night (1034) Bad night (3761)
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  (435): View more from Utah

  i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.

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  (435): i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down. http://tfl.nu/j1eb
  Replies (16) Good night (1203) Bad night (3298)
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  (408): View more from California

  Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.

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  (408): Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something. http://tfl.nu/it4y
  Replies (15) Good night (2684) Bad night (1055)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.

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  (305): so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/ez3t
  Replies (24) Good night (4086) Bad night (1253)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity

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  (717): There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity http://tfl.nu/xz3u
  Replies (6) Good night (1869) Bad night (808)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.

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  (850): There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends. http://tfl.nu/r3vo
  Replies (3) Good night (1622) Bad night (501)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?

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  (817): I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes? http://tfl.nu/cea8
  Replies (15) Good night (2866) Bad night (505)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.

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  (814): This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off. http://tfl.nu/kq64
  Replies (11) Good night (581) Bad night (1005)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation

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  (484): i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation http://tfl.nu/uy0z
  Replies (5) Good night (1334) Bad night (471)
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  (831): View more from California

  Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE

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  (831): Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE http://tfl.nu/2zmk
  Replies (3) Good night (377) Bad night (586)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation

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  (281): I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation http://tfl.nu/41s4
  Replies (1) Good night (218) Bad night (322)

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