How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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