found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
