I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
