Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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