i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize