My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize