You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
