There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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