If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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