Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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