my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize
