Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
