No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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