I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize