My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
