We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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