Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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