Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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