Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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