Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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