i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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