At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
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