There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Quick, to the slutcave!
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
